Stitches (2012) A Party Clown's Revenge

I like it when a movie surprises me.

Sometimes late at night, I roll through Netflix and see what's out in the ether.  Stumbling across this oddball British-Irish horror comedy about an undead clown seeking revenge on a kid after being killed at a birthday party, I really wasn't expecting much.  But strangely enough, I ended up pleasantly surprised by the gory slapstick intentional cheese-fest that was Stitches.

Director Conor McMahon seems to be following the Peter Jackson path of starting off a career by turning grant money into bloody splashes of manic-comic theater.  You see a little inspiration from Jackson's early offerings like Bad Taste and Dead Alive, where over-the-top gore leans more toward the humorous.  Stitches doesn't take itself too seriously, offering up a wild premise, stereotypical-and-we-know-it characters, and circus-themed dispatching of those characters.

So it goes like this:  Stitches (comedian Ross Noble in his film debut) is a local clown hired to perform at young Tom's birthday party.  Tom isn't such a bad kid, but his friends range from somewhat to extremely obnoxious.  They taunt Stitches who, admittedly, isn't a very good clown.  The taunting takes a tragic turn when an accident the kids cause leaves Stitches with a huge kitchen knife through his eye into his skull.  The night of Stitches' funeral, Tom stumbles across a strange ritual as clowns honor their comrade.  Years later, it's Tom's (Tommy Knight of The Sarah Jane Adventures) 17th birthday, and he has a pretty understandable fear of clowns.  He's anxious and rather wimpy but his friends want to throw him a blowout, even though he's unsure.  The party includes all his friends from the original party, as well as his longtime crush, Kate (Gemma Leigh Devereux).  Before too long, though, an unwanted party guest makes his grand return:  Stitches, resurrected by some strange magic the clown cult instilled.  Stitches arrives and takes out each of the teenage partygoers from years before in sickeningly creative and often hilarious ways.  Brain scoop, balloon pump, umbrella - so weird, yet so Peter Jackson-ish.  It's then up to Tom and Kate to figure out a way to send Stitches back to Hell - or wherever undead clowns go.

Stitches is a rousing debut for Noble, who nails it in his first film.  He's snappy and slovenly, spouting 80's-style one-liners usually associated with supernatural killers.  "He had to...head off." "Now that's...food for thought."  Stitches is a killer clown, to be sure, and we've seen many of those, good ones and not-so-good.  But obviously, this film doesn't take things too seriously and just wants to tell a funny, wildly splattered tale of redemption for one kid and the ability to make intestine balloon animals for one not-quite-dead clown.

So make sure you treat that clown at a kid's party right.  Put away those knives and don't let your kids be obnoxious.

Until next time, here's the trailer:

Some Mini-Reviews Since Time Flew By

Yeesh, I had no idea it had been that long since I'd posted anything.  I've got to stop getting distracted by shiny objects.

Let's get caught up with some "mini-reviews," shall we?

Almost Human (2013) - Definitely a shoestring budget and an attempt to recreate the magic of 80's VHS horror and slasher flicks.  It tells the story of what happens when a UFO abductee returns years later and has gone from kindly bearded fellow to homicidal maniac with some new alien body parts.  Good effort but the execution fell a bit short.  Any intrigue melted away and it needed more story.  Nice practical effects, though.

Red State (2011) - Kevin Smith takes an effective journey into non-comedy with a suspense thriller about sees some local boys run afoul of the town's crazy church/cult leader that oddly seems like the funeral-protesting wack-a-doos in real life.  Not as talky as a lot of Smith's other offerings, and don't look for a cameo by Jay and Silent Bob.  Tense storytelling and good performances, especially from Michael Parks as the frustratingly smug leader.

Haunter (2013) - A pleasant surprise, this haunted house mystery sees the story told from the ghost's point of view, much like the awesome I Am A Ghost.  In this case, Abagail Breslin turns in a great performance as the ghost of a murdered girl who comes to the realization that she's dead and tries to awaken her family to the fact as well as prevent an evil spirit from his eternal murder spree.  Good tension and a good story.

Jug Face (2013) - This one really started off on the right foot but didn't go as far as I hoped.  It's the story of a young girl who's part of a backwoods community that worships a pit that has healing properties but also demands a sacrifice.   The likeness of who is to be sacrificed is carved onto a clay jug, but when the girl hides hers, the pit expresses its displeasure.  Fine acting and a creepy vibe made it good but the story felt like it lost steam.

Frankenstein's Army (2013) - A crazy Dutch-American-Czech production set in World War II that follows a group of weary Russian soldiers who follow a distress signal to a small town.  What they find there is insanity as the descendent of Victor Frankenstein says "the hell with it" and sets his insane creations on Ally and Axis alike.  The monster design is tremendous and there's no shortage of blood and guts as the movie descends more and more into utter madness.  I dug it because it wanted to be nuts and it got its wish.

My Bloody Valentine (1981) - Remade just a few years ago, this cult classic came from the old school of matching psychotic killers with holidays.  The residents of a town relive an old nightmare that took place on February 14 when grisly murders pile up as the day grows closer.  Add to that the Eternally Doomed Teen Party and you know the body count rises.  Good 80's wackiness and a murder mystery to boot.

Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013) - While I felt the first one went off the rails a bit, yet still told an intriguing story, I felt the second chapter was a little stronger.  The poor Lambert family is back and just when they think they dodged an astral bullet, it's the father who becomes the center of a spiritual attack.  Just the right amount of ghostly and strange, I enjoyed it like I usually enjoy seeing Rose Byrne.

+1 (2013) - An interesting take on a sci-fi standard of what duplicates would do if they met.  A meteor crashes, causing a nearby party to experience a little glitch in the matrix.  Time splits and people meet themselves from a few seconds behind.  An interesting story set on a strange premise with decent performances.  Not a bad choice if you like being weirded out by time and space.

Hellbenders (2012) - With a good cast and a premise that borders on sacrilege, this movie was more fun than it had a right to be.  The Augustine Interfaith Order of Hellbound Saints are a ragtag group of badasses who also happen to be priests of various faiths that sin on purpose on orders of The Pope so that if a demon possesses them during an exorcism, they can kill themselves and drag the demon to Hell.  Good guys who do bad things to prevent the really bad things.  In this flick, they have to stop a runaway Norse demon from pulling Hell up around the world.  Funny and with a touch of honor, the cast is headed by the reliable Clifton Collins Jr. and Clancy Brown.

Willow Creek (2013) - Oh, Willow Creek, how I wanted to like you.  A good director in Bobcat Goldthwait and some really suspenseful moments still added up to a movie that was a hair below "OK."  It's a found footage style movie about a couple setting out to make a documentary about the Patterson Bigfoot sighting and getting much more than they bargained for.  Admittedly, the tent scene is suspense at its best, but the ending left me feeling like the whole thing was meant to be a tongue-in-cheek joke.  Maybe it was, but I was hoping for a little more.

OK, that should just about do it for now.  I gotta stop taking so long between reviews.  Maybe some caffeine would help.

Until next time!

The Bay (2012) That'll Put Me Off Swimming

If you look back at the early, rock-n-roll days of this blog, you'll find an entry in which I wrote a list of things that skeeve me out.  One of those things that skeeve me out is an object just under the surface of the water (boats, old buildings, skeletons) as well as things you know are there, but can't see (sharks, bigger boats, Cthulhu).

Well, you might was well add sea bugs to that list because The Bay did its share to do it for me.

The Bay is an interesting film even before you start watching it.  Released to little fanfare, it's made in the found footage style and it's an eco-horror film directed by none other than Barry Levinson (Diner, Rain Man, Avalon).  It doesn't seem like the type of movie one would expect from Levinson, but good directors often take chances.  For the most part, he scored quite well with this increasingly creepy movie with a message.

In a small, idyllic Maryland town, a celebration of its history on Chesapeake Bay brings the town together.  But there's a bit of a dark underside.  There's high levels of toxicity in the water thanks to a huge chicken processing plant and a cutting-corners filtration plant installed by the mayor to give the illusion of safety.  Two researchers know this, but are dead from a mysterious malady before they can turn in the proper proof.  Slowly, through the eyes of several security cameras, phones, news cameras, and video conferences, it's obvious that something is happening in the town.  People are getting violently sick, developing ugly sores on their bodies.  They begin to react violently or irrationally.  Then it all just goes downhill from there.  Our various emotions are toyed with as we see this horrifying epidemic unfold through a young reporter's tapes, town security cams, a young girl's iPhone, police dash cams, and the one that builds the most tension:  the video camera of a young family oblivious of what's happening taking a boat to the town.

Using a cast of talented unknowns, Levinson adds some meat to the bones of the found footage genre.  He uses some good jump scares here and there, but it's the creepy atmosphere that slowly builds over time that really made the film something good.  The town at the beginning is the town you want to live in, and the town at the end looks like something out of a Romero film.  This all happens in such a short amount of time, you wonder how anyone can get out of it or how they could possibly survive.  The tension and atmosphere are on display here.

Some viewers may applaud or bemoan the message of pollution and pollution regulation that sits behind the main face of horror here.  Keep in mind:  this is just a story.  It's fiction.  It's the fictional story of a fictional situation happening to fictional people because of some other fictional situation.  Relax.  Personally, I think pollution is pretty much bad all around.  I don't want to go swimming in unfiltered chicken poop, and I certainly don't want mutant sea bugs burrowing into my skin and giving me boils the size of dinner plates.

Enjoy the trailer:

I Am A Ghost (2012) Why I Love Indie Horror Films

One of the joys I have of writing this blog is spreading the word of various horror movies:  classic, new, big budget, indie, strange, subtle...well, you get the idea.  It's a genre I love, and I like to put my thoughts out there.  One of the bigger joys is touching base with independent filmmakers and performers.  I always feel like if I can get at least a few more people to see their work based on an article I write, then I'm happy with that.  It's fun for me, and I've been able to meet some really nice, talented people.

This brings me to the fun I had watching I Am A Ghost, an incredibly impressive independent horror film written and directed by H. P. Mendoza.  I'd been aware of the film for a while, and when I was made aware that the film was available on video-on-demand, I had to check it out.  Having been in touch with the filmmakers before, I was excited to see what they had created.

I was not sorry.

Boy, was I not sorry!  What I got to see was an ambitious, carefully-crafted thriller that looked great and featured an excellent performance from a leading lady, and taut suspense that wound up right until the final frame.  I love indie filmmaking because of the energy and the outside-the-box creativity and the hunger to craft a great film with sometimes very little in the way of resources.  "Working with what you got," some would say.  I Am A Ghost works with what it has, and then some.

Anna Ishida plays Emily, the title character.  It's no surprise that she's a ghost going through a mundane daily routine in a huge, beautiful house.  There are some things that seem a little off, such as Emily's breakfast time and the moments where she cries in pain and confusion in front of a mirror.  In one certain room, she hears a disembodied voice calling her name:  a medium named Sylvia (Jeannie Baroga in an unseen role).  Sylvia tries to help Emily leave the house, but some unknown factor keeps her there.  As the film unfolds, Emily struggles to uncover the mystery of how she died and how she can finally move on to the afterlife.

The film has a 60's and 70's look to it, right from the title card (and you know how I love those).  The screen borders are curved throughout, creating a unique point of view.  Despite the spaciousness of the house, there is a sense of claustrophobia.  Something is happening with poor Emily, and we're not quite sure what yet, although it becomes clear as the movie builds towards a horrifying climax.  Mendoza has built an intriguing, great-looking film that he expertly guides you through.  His is a voice and vision I'm excited to see grow from this already-strong base. In terms of performance, Ishida owns the screen.  Her Emily is scared, confused, complicated - and Ishida gracefully brings each of those facets to the forefront.  She is the face of the movie, and she is more than up to the task.

I've had the opportunity to see and review quite a few great independent horror features, and in communicating with the filmmakers and performers, I'm always happy to see the passion and the excitement they have in creating something new and something unlike the paint-by-numbers too often seen in big studio fare.  I'm excited to see what these creative people having coming down the pike, and really hope to see more from Mendoza and Ishida.

I Am A Ghost is available on DVD and VOD, and if you'd like more information, check out their website right here.

In the meantime, check out the trailer:

Dead Before Dawn (2012) Don't Play With Curses

So when I watched The Bell Witch Haunting on a whim, I insisted that I could no longer trust my whims.

But then I watched Dead Before Dawn on a whim, and well...I feel a little more trust in my whims again.

Now, I know that Dead Before Dawn wasn't received with open arms like other horror comedies.  Some liked it, many didn't.  But they're not writing this review...I am, and I declare that I found it to be snappy, fast-paced, fun, and often hilarious.  I also realize that horror comedies can be really hit or miss.  Three of my favorite movies, horror or otherwise, lean heavily towards comedy:  Shaun of the Dead, Zombieland, and Tucker and Dale vs. Evil.  They set the bar really high.  There's dozens more that can't match the perfect blend of frights and follies, but every so often, you run across a movie that still does a great job in its attempt.

Written by Tim Doiron and directed by April Mullen, the movie opens with a young boy witnessing his father being possessed by a demon in a store full of occult items.  Later in life, that same boy, Casper Galloway (Devon Bostick of Diary of a Wimpy Kid) is a jumpy but quick-witted young man who has a close circle of eccentric friends and a crush on a popular girl, Charlotte (Martha McIsaac).  When Casper's grandfather, Horus (Christopher Lloyd), wins a lifetime achievement award from occult enthusiasts, he recruits Casper to watch the store.  Of course, Casper is hesitant, but does out of respect for his grandfather.  When his friends come to visit him, an urn containing a malevolent spirit is broken.  Casper freaks out, but the others joke about a "curse," rattling off ideas of what the curse might be.  Turns out that what they say comes to pass:  people turn into zombie/demon hybrids called "zemons" when they make eye contact with any of the gang.  Also, oddly enough, if a person french-kisses a zemon, the zemon will become their slave.  Oh,  yes, and they have to reverse the curse before dawn or they become zemons as well.

As you might guess, the night goes south from there. 

It doesn't take long for the group to figure out that the curse is real, but not before there is carnage and confusion.  From there, it becomes a race against time to reverse what's happened before the sun rises.

I found Dead Before Dawn to be snappy with quick moments of hilarity and a likable cast of characters.  Lloyd even manages to sneak in a "Great Scott!" for all you Back To The Future fans.  Bostick is energetic and jumpy as Casper, and it I could see where that might grind on people after a while.  Still, his reactions are often funny and in some cases, genuine.  The rest of the cast seems to be having a great time making the movie, and you'll catch a couple interesting cameos by Kevin McDonald of Kids In The Hall and Boyd Banks of the Dawn of the Dead remake.

The movie was fun in my eyes, and went a long way to restore my faith in my "oh-let-me-take-a-look-at-this-film" whims.  The script by Doiron, who plays mug-obsessed Seth, and the direction by Mullen, who plays Casper's best friend and photographer Becky, are very key aspects in lending the film its youthful energy.

Now, for your viewing enjoyment, here's the trailer:

The Lords of Salem (2012) Little Taste of the 70s

Somewhere in him, Rob Zombie has the most amazing horror film.  He's got a singular vision, a unique eye for detail, and a deep knowledge of all genres of horror.  I'm not saying his present movies are bad.  For me, they're "almost there."  He's got the perfect horror movie waiting in the wings, and he's almost there.

Written and directed by Zombie, The Lords of Salem edges ever so closer to being the definitive Rob Zombie film.  It has that grindhouse look, with a 70s-style title card and aesthetic, even though it's set in modern times.  With his versions of the Halloween movies, he still had to conform to a certain mold.  But with The Lords of Salem, we see him going back to his "I'll do it my way, thanks" style.  While Lords didn't totally grab me, there is a certain flair to it that intrigues me.  It's that closer step to that defining movie.

The plot is straight out of 70s witch exploitation movies, and that's not really a bad thing.  Sherri Moon Zombie plays Heidi, a successful Salem, Massachusetts, nighttime DJ along with her co-stars Whitey (Jeff Daniel Phillips) and Herman (Ken Foree).  One night, she receives a mysterious album from a group called The Lords.  Upon playing the record, the strange, archaic music causes her to feel strange and have weird visions of witches.  She gets to know a researcher, Francis Mattias (Bruce Davison), who investigates the record and The Lords, and finds some horrifying connections.  Meanwhile, Heidi's landlord (Judy Geeson) and her two overly-nice friends (Dee Wallace and Rocky Horror Picture Show's Patricia Quinn) take a strong interest in Heidi and her role in the increasing weirdness surrounding The Lords' upcoming concert in Salem.  Heidi's hallucinations increase as she fights the terrible implications they offer and her own personal demons, as she is a former drug abuser.

The visual aesthetic is what struck me the most.  There is a rich palette of colors in certain scenes, especially the dream sequences.  Everyday life looks like...every day life.  But, yeah, those dream sequences.  I saw it written somewhere else that Zombie had channeled Ken Russell in this film, and I'd say that's pretty accurate.  Russell always had the most oddball, foreboding, and twisted hallucinogenic sequences in film, and you see it echoed in the work of David Lynch and Lars von Trier.  Zombie goes for it here as well, and for the most part, it's not bad.  I didn't like the movie as much as I liked his insane House of 1000 Corpses or the twisted buddy-road sequel The Devil's Rejects, but I definitely didn't dislike it.  It fell somewhere in the middle for me, with the hints of something possibly greater waiting in the wings in future films.

Oh, yeah, lest I forget:  this movie features the creepiest Meg Foster performance in years, possibly her most intense role as the ancient head of an evil coven.  If you've seen They Live, you know who Meg Foster is.  Oh, yes, if you're a fan of hers, I think you'll enjoy her scene-stealing moments in this movie.

Until next time - which will be in a couple days, actually, as I have a great interview with two independent filmmakers coming up - here's the trailer:

The Devil Inside (2012) How Not To End A Film

I was warned.

People told me not to see last year's The Devil Inside.  "You'll be mad," they said.  "You'll hate the ending," they cautioned.  Did I listen?  Nope.  I was reckless.  I laughed in the face of movie-time-wasting and put the pedal to the metal.

Ah, yes, I was warned.

Let me say this right off the bat:  if you replace the very last moment of The Devil Inside with a good, solid ending - hey, even an ambiguous one - you'd have an honest-to-goodness decent film.  I wasn't angry at the film.  No, I don't get angry at films.  Unless they're Hardly Working.  Not angry, but disappointed.  The movie had my interest, then snatched it away like Charlie Brown's football.

Directed and co-written by William Brent Bell, The Devil Inside begins with a 911 recording and news footage of the aftermath of a triple homicide that involved the local clergy.  A dazed woman, Maria Rossi (Suzan Crowley) - the one who called 911 and admitted to the murders - is led out and eventually locked away in an asylum in Italy.  Years later, her daughter Isabella (Fernanda Andrade), enlists a documentary crew to help her reconnect with her mother and investigate allegations of demonic possession.

She meets two young priests, Father Ben (Simon Quarterman) and Father David (Evan Helmuth), who perform exorcisms on the side, and they promise to help her with her mother's little problem of too many tenants in her soul's apartment.  Needless to say, things don't really go as planned.  The entity inside of Maria is immensely powerful and doesn't stay confined to just one little place.  It's a real go-getter.  Well, there's a climactic scene at a hospital then in a car and then...

The ending.

I usually have a no-spoiler thing here but I don't think at this point I'm spoiling anything.  The movie ends by telling you to go to a website to find out more.

That's right.  Go to a website.  To find out more.

It's been called one of the worst endings ever.  Like I said, it's not that the movie itself - to me - was bad.  I was actually enjoying it, and that's where the disappointment lies.  The movie ends with the website and just walks out the door.

Ah, well.  You can't win 'em all.

Still, it was no Hardly Working.

Sinister (2012) Films In The Attic

You know that idiom about curiosity and what it does to cats?  Yeah, well, if you ever happen to stumble across an old box of Super 8 film reels in your attic, it's probably best that you smile politely, say "well-played," then pack up the family and get the hell out of there, speed limits be damned.

If Ethan Hawke's character in 2012's fine horror offering, Sinister, had heeded my advice, things would have been a whole lot easier.  Then again, we wouldn't have this surprisingly good and creepy movie to give us a cautionary tale about leaving some things alone.

Written by C. Robert Cargill and director Scott Derrickson, Sinister sort caught me by surprise like that old friend you accidentally run into on a sidewalk after eating a delicious pizza.  A pleasant surprise, and you feel pretty good about it.  The movie kicks right off with a disturbing mystery seen through the lens of a Super 8 film camera.  Four hooded figures - a family, one would rightly presume - slowly hung in a tree as a falling branch hoists them up.  Scratchy, off-putting ambient music plays as we get an unflinching view of their demise, and it's a mystery as to who they are and why it happened.  Months later, true crime writer Ellison Oswald (Hawke) and his family move into the very house where the murders occurred so Oswald can produce his next blockbuster, which he sorely needs.  Things aren't easy though:  he "forgets" to tell his family about the house's history and the townspeople, like the sheriff (former senator Fred Thompson), don't exactly like his sensationalism in their mourning town.

Going through the house one night, Oswald finds a box of old Super 8 film canisters labeled with such innocent titles as "Pool Party '66" and "Sleepy Time '98."  As he watches them, the sweet scenes turn into horrific ones, as each family is brutally murdered - all but one, as with each tragic event, one child in the family goes missing.  At first, the murders don't seem connected, but Oswald becomes obsessed and he's no slouch in the detective department.  Much like in The Shining, Oswald becomes more involved with his book and the investigation than his family, who is not adjusting well to the new digs.  His daughter wants to go back to their old house and his son's night terrors increase in intensity.

Oswald sees a mysterious figure in one, then all of the videos, presiding over all of the murders.  He also uncovers an occult symbol and enlists Professor Jonas (Vincent D'Onofrio) to help decipher it.  When he discovers the truth, he pretty much wishes he hadn't asked in the first place.  With the help of a local deputy, Oswald puts most of the pieces together and it isn't exactly a yellow brick road from that point onward.  Yep, that's right...not gonna spoil it.

I had heard that Sinister was pretty good, and those rumblings were correct.  It has a familiar plot - mystery with a family in possibly supernatural danger - but the way in which it's presented delivered for me.  The Super 8 shots provide just enough "found footage" that it fills in certain blanks and makes your skin crawl.  The ambient sound and music, especially during those scenes, was a highlight.  There's a mythology, but the movie didn't get lost in it.  It gives you just enough information without going too far with it.  Ethan Hawke is quite good as the burned-out writer looking for his comeback, balancing between being excited for juicy new secrets and being horrified by what he sees on the films.  It's a creepy film, eschewing the "pretty people" formula of most mainstream horror flicks.  I just realized how "hipster" that made me sound, but it's true.  It's honestly a step in the right direction.  There were a couple moments of "jump scares" that made me utter a slightly disappointed "bah" sound, but other than those, it was very, very effective.

So, hey, moving into a new house?  Kids drawing strange pictures on the walls?  Find a box of old films in the attic?

Yeah, you might want to get out now.

Paranormal Activity 4 (2012) Might As Well Finish It Out

I always have some high hopes for stories that play out a mythology.  But with those high hopes comes a caveat:  if you're building a mythology, you best back it up.

I've been mostly pleasantly surprised by the Paranormal Activity franchise, and I can certainly appreciate telling captivating stories on a shoestring budget.  But there's a little matter of running out of steam, reaching that point where the story strains to be told instead of simply falling into place.  As much as I hoped Paranormal Activity 4 would wrap up the mythology of the demon-plagued sisters, it sort of just peeked in to show what happened to one loose thread while not really answering much of anything else.

Directed by Henry Joost and Ariel Schuman (who did Paranormal Activity 3 and Catfish) and written by Christopher Landon based on a story by Chad Feehan, Paranormal 4 intends to wrap up the story began with poor, possessed Katie (Katie Featherston).  We know that she's disappeared along with her nephew, Hunter, leaving a trail of bodies and mystery in her wake.  In this fourth installment, a strange young boy named Robbie (Brady Allen) wanders over to the featured family's house after his mother goes to the hospital.  He's an odd duck, making the daughter Alex (Kathryn Newton) and her best friend Ben (Matt Shively) suspicious, especially since he takes an interest in Alex's adopted younger brother, Wyatt (Aiden Lovekamp).  Robbie stays with the family for a while, and of course, strange things begin to happen.  Weird gatherings happen at the house across the street and the family's computers - which Ben has rigged to record video 24/7 - pick up some really bizarre things.  Most aren't too frightening, to be honest, but I really, really liked the use of the night vision camera along with the Xbox Kinect, which casts a sea of small dots over everything in the room.  There is a sequence late in the film where that really looks tremendous.  Things get really crazy when Robbie's mom re-appears, and they mythology gets tied together somewhat.  It hurtles toward a weird, tragic ending that frankly left me wanting a little more story.

That's not to say there wasn't anything to like.  Newton and Shively were natural, believable,and likable as the amateur detectives.  They both hit home runs in terms of creating characters with whom a viewer could identify.  A couple instances during the climactic chase at the end were really nice, and as I mentioned before, I really enjoyed the use of the Kinect as a new visual device.  Maybe others got more out of the film than I did, and I hope that's the case.  For me, personally, I wanted more in the way of what the demon's endgame was.  I assume it wants the world, or does it just want to be a nasty little menace?  I don't always need to be led around by the nose, but I would've enjoyed more direction in the mythology.

It wasn't altogether horrible, but when compared to the other films in the series - which I enjoyed - it fell a bit short.  But hey, not every franchise can be perfect.

And now I'm going to go play some Kinect with my invisible friend, who always wins at Fruit Ninja...

Let's Get 2013 Rolling Here

You know, one of my New Year's resolutions was to pay more attention this poor blog and to my other blog about comics, Born In The Silver Age.

Now - 15 whole days after 2013 starts - I finally get around to writing my annual year-end entry.  Ah, well.  Guess I'll have to practice being a little more timely.

First and foremost:  thank you to all of you who read, enjoy, are entertained, and don't steal my words.  I write this blog for fun and to keep the writing wheels juiced and I hope you get some fun out of it as well.

I had the pleasure of watching some really crazy, really insane, and in some cases, really great horror films in 2012.  Every year, I like to make a list of the ten movies I enjoyed reviewing.  They don't have to be films that were made that year, just ones that I reviewed. during the year.  I also like to throw in some classics and short films as extras just to spread the love.

But hey, let's get to my list.  Here they are, in no particular order, the horror films I enjoyed reviewing the most in 2012:

The Inkeepers - Atmospheric to the point where the setting is a character in itself, a Ti West specialty.  A great little closed-door haunted mystery with some solid acting and chills.  It's a quiet, slow burn that leaves you clues to how you see the ending.

The Cabin In The Woods - The horror movie equivalent to riding a rollercoaster backward after drinking five Red Bulls and staying up all night. Like I say in my review, I can't begin to get into this utterly insane, madcap love letter to the horror genre without revealing a lot, so just see it and try to keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times.

Behind The Mask:  The Rise of Leslie Vernon - Another in the "insane" category, this leaps from fake documentary to get-out-of-the-house classic horror with expert delicacy.  You really can't take your eyes off this story of an up-and-comer in a world where all the classic slasher villains exist as inspiration to young Leslie.  Funny, clever, and scary, just like Mr. Vernon.

The Pact - I'm a huge fan of atmosphere and, if you want to get technical, the use of space in the frame of the movie screen.  The Pact delivers on those in a big way.  Twists and turns, and a stellar performance by Caity Lotz (and a really good showing from Casper Van Dien), made this quiet little film a favorite among some of us humble horror folk.

[REC]3: Genesis - As well as being a fan of atmosphere, I love a little insanity, as you can tell.  A real departure from the other installments in one of my favorite franchises, this chapter leans more of the wacky as we're privy to what happens when the disease ravages a wedding party and what the lovers will do to reunite.

The Loved Ones - Probably one of my favorites this past year was this Australian gem.  Utterly outstanding performances and a plot that dances like that slick kid that wasn't from your school but knew all the "big city" moves.  I haven't cheered this hard for a horror protagonist in ages, and that speaks to the cast and crew of this wild flick.

Vampires - I'm not huge on vampires, but this Belgian horror-comedy about a dysfunctional vampire family trying to maintain its status among the elite of its neighborhood really grew on me.  Another fake documentary, it had interesting characters who forge their own paths through an odd and sometimes goofy dynamic laced with real scenes of horror.

Kill List - Oh, this one had both of those things I mentioned:  atmosphere and copious amounts of crazy, albeit on a more "slow burn" level.  And then some.  What starts as a "hitman out for one final job" road picture turns into something entirely different.  By the end, you're saying "What.  The.  Hell?"  A great buildup of tension leads to that "did I just see that?" ending.

Lovely Molly - Gretchen Lodge is so good in this movie, you're then surprised to learn how little acting she had done before it.  She carries this movie like a Heisman Trophy winner as a young woman left to her own devices in her childhood home, haunted by memories and...something else?  Very strange, with that performance by Lodge making one hope she gets more roles.

Rare Imports: A Christmas Tale - The last movie I reviewed in 2012 turned out to be a real treat.  An import from Finland, it explores a more pagan Santa Claus myth with gorgeous scenery and one of the smartest and bravest kids ever in a horror film.  The movie is strange and spooky, but with a nod and a wink...just like old Saint Nick.

And one classic film that I must mention:

The Thing (1982) - It was about time that I reviewed this wonderful John Carpenter film.   Claustrophobic, stark, and utterly terrifying, it's got so many levels and stories within stories.  It bears repeat viewings.  And honestly, I didn't dislike the prequel of the same name.

And one short film:

Exit 7A - What a simple, straightforward, entertaining short in the same vein as Twilight Zone and with a kind of ongoing story potential that could sustain a series based on the premise and certain characters.  I like being sent short films that I really enjoy, and this was definitely one of them.

And one so-incredibly-bad-it's-incredibly tremendous-film:

Troll 2 - Yep, I finally saw this...film.  It is EVERYTHING I wanted it to be and more.  It's something that truly must be experienced at least once in a lifetime.  It also led to one of my favorite reviews to write.

Some honorable mentions: Absentia, The Woman In Black, We Need To Talk About Kevin, The Caller, and V/H/S.

Again, I thank everyone for reading as this little blog heads towards its fourth year.  Hopefully, I'll have some new things to spice up the old place and provide some more of my words and thoughts.

Happy New Year!

Chernobyl Diaries (2012) Needed More Radioactivity

Because of my fascination with abandoned places - thanks to an excursion I once made to an abandoned mental health facility in Detroit during the 80's - I have had a particular interest in the former Soviet working city, Pripyat.  Where did those who lived in Pripyat work?  Why, Chernobyl, of course.  Yeah, that Chernobyl.  I look at pictures of the empty streets, desolate buildings, and overgrown parks, and I feel my creative side bubbling:  what ghosts linger there?  Who or what calls it home now?

The 2012 American horror film Chernobyl Diaries attempts to answer that for us.  Directed by Bradley Parker and written by Carey Van Dyke and Oren Peli (one of the creators of the Paranormal Activity franchise), it tells what could have been a great "what if" story.  For me, though, it fell a little short - it provided some decent quick thrills and really great atmosphere, but in the end, I just didn't feel it.  I love the abandoned city setting but couldn't latch onto anything the movie offered.

The premise is good and simple:  Chris (former pop star Jesse McCartney), his girlfriend Natalie (Olivia Taylor Dudley), and their friend Amanda (Devin Kelley) meet up with Chris' wilder and more affluent brother Paul (Jonathan Sadowski) in the Ukraine before heading to Moscow, where Chris wants to propose to Natalie.  Paul talks the gang into taking a day tour to the ghost city of Pripyat, and they are joined by former Spetnaz tour guide Yuri (Dimitri Diatchenko) and another couple, Zoe (Ingrid Bolso Berdal) and Michael (Nathan Phillips).  The day goes well until they return to the van, which has been rendered inoperable.  Night falls, and since the woods are filled with hungry wolves, dogs, and bears, the group stays in the van until strange noises sound in the night.  Things go from bad to really bad when Yuri and Chris head out to investigate, and only Chris comes back sporting a spanking new bleeding leg.  Oh, and Yuri's gone.  The group is determined to leave, but is met with severe disappointment at every turn.  And by "disappointment," I mean a pack of wild dogs, no radios, nightfall, and something worse on two legs.  The next night brings the group up against something that has been stalking them from the get-go and things go from really bad to "why did we agree to do this damn tour?"

Like I said, I loved the setting.  It was, to me, the best part of the film.  Pripyat is eerie and quiet, historically tragic and intensely interesting.  The idea of something lurking in the dark among all those empty buildings is very appealing to me.  However, I didn't feel a connection to any of the characters, even with the odds they were up against.  Paul, tortured over what he feels is his responsibility, came pretty close as he aches over what his brother is going through.  I really liked Yuri, too.  You get a sense he's pretty bad-ass, and isn't the stereotypical "gonna take advantage of these silly Americans" sort of Eastern European character.  He genuinely just wants to show them a good time.

In Chernobyl Diaries, sadly nothing really popped or crackled for me, and while it had a few chills and spills, it didn't really do much for me although it was a decent shot at the "from bad to worse" theme.  Not a bad film, but it could've been much, much more.

So, dear readers, if you get the chance to explore Pripyat - which apparently one can do with the right connections and the understanding of a short visit to the irradiated ex-city - make sure the van you're in works and that in case it doesn't, you bring some doggies treats for distraction.

Check out the trailer:

Grave Encounters 2 (2012) Going Off The Rails

When I saw the original Grave Encounters, I had low expectations.  I hoped I would like it, but I wasn't going to be shocked if I didn't.  Turns out I did like it.  It both paid homage to and made fun of the slew of paranormal investigation shows all over our televisions.  Now when I learned of a sequel, I set the bar a little higher.  It might be another round of some fun found-footage shenanigans.  Did it exceed expectations again?

The answer comes in two halves:  First half (maybe two-thirds) of the movie was creative and intriguing metafiction.  After that, though, it was like the train ran right off the rails.

To recap the first film as briefly as I can, and in case you don't want to click over to my review of it, a team of paranormal investigators enter an old asylum to film an episode of their show, Grave Encounters.  As the viewer, we watch the final hours of the team as they fall to the terrifying power of an evil location.  Jump forward a year (nine years in the film series), and we have a new film written by original creators The Vicious Brothers and directed by John Poliquin.  We have a whole new group of cannon fodder film production people ready to be the next to wander smartly into an abandoned asylum.

Yeah, that graffiti should be a HUGE red flag, there, buddy.

After film student Alex Wright (not the old WCW wrestler) posts a scathing review of the original Grave Encounters, he begins receiving e-mails and videos from someone known only as "deathawaits6."  Much to the concern of his friends, he becomes obsessed with the original hospital (the name of which is bleeped out).  So much so, that he eventually uncovers evidence that the original cast did indeed disappear and makes meticulous plans to make the ultimate documentary.  Alex convinces the others to head to the location and meet "deathawaits6," who promises to provide all the information they need.  As with the first film, and as you may well have guessed, things don't go very well once they're inside.  The film students are menaced in frightening, hyperactive ways along with a new twist on the first movie's "the place won't let us leave" atmosphere.  When the kids end up in an underground hallway - the same one set at the end of the first film - Grave Encounters 2 becomes like a speeding car hitting a patch of ice on a wintry highway.  The rest of the film - which I promise I won't spoil in case you'd like to watch it - careens off in a whole different direction that frankly didn't catch my fancy.

I really like metafiction - stories about stories - and the first part of Grave Encounters 2 was a clever example of the self-aware quality of the difficult genre.  Even the little things, such as video bloggers in the beginning completely trashing the first movie, were quite funny and gave the audience a little nod-and-wink.  When the pace and the story took off in the strange direction it did, I felt somewhat disappointed.  It was like they added elements that weren't really needed - elements that actually would have worked much better if left to our imagination, in my little opinion.

If the film had maintained the air of just-out-of-sight mystery along with frequent kinetic thrills, I would have liked it even more.  Definitely not the worst I've ever seen, but I really hoped for more.

Until next time, my dear readers, have a look at the trailer and try to not to get curious if some anonymous person sends you videos, inviting you to check their "awesome" asylum...

V/H/S (2012) Modern Campfire Stories

Sometimes I find old VHS tapes hiding in storage bins.  I'll pop them in and the worst I may think is, "damn, my hair was blonder in 1993."  Nothing too scary.  No ghosts, no demons, no knife-wielding maniacs.

The same can't be said for the doomed characters in the collaborative found footage release, V/H/S.

Found footage films seem to be all the rage these days.  Personally, I like the subgenre, but like the modern zombie film, it could suffer from burnout.  Still, there is a lot to enjoy until that happens.  It seemed like a dream lineup when it was announced that several independent horror directors would combine to create a found footage anthology, sort of a Blair Witch Project meets Creepshow.  Modern campfire stories, if you will.  While I found V/H/S to be extremely intriguing, I was left wanting more, almost as if there was a big piece missing.

The movie itself consists of a framing story by A Horrible Way To Die director Adam Wingard called "Tape 56" and provides the reason for how we're able to see each chapter.  The wraparound story follows a group of opportunistic Internet bad boys who make money filming themselves performing general acts of maliciousness (destroying an empty house, terrorizing innocent women, etc.).  They're hired to break into a house and find a mysterious VHS tape.  Upon entering they find hundreds of tapes, blank TV's, and a dead man sitting in a chair.  As strange things happen around them, various members of the team put in random tapes, giving us each story.

The first chapter, called "Amateur Night," is by one of the directors of The Signal, David Bruckner (specifically, he directed the first part of that film).  It tells the story of a group of dudes documenting their night of luring women to their motel room through the use of a spy cam on one of the guys' glasses.  Things take a turn for the strange when an odd girl with a limited vocabulary ("I like you") tags along and gets caught in the motel room with drunk, sex-starved guys.  This is very much like a modern campfire story, maybe a cautionary tale from inebriated college dudes who see themselves as ladies' men.  Yeah, let's just say it didn't work out well for these guys.

The second chapter, from Ti West (The House of the Devil, The Innkeepers), is called "Second Honeymoon."  Here, we find a young couple out on the road, enjoying what appears to be the said second honeymoon.  It starts out innocently enough, but there seems to be a third person enjoying the trip as well, someone who scoops up the video camera and takes a few shots of the sleeping couple.  I love West's work but I felt there could have been more to this entry.  Still, there's the basis for an intriguing story that would've worked even better over a longer length of time.  After all, West is the modern master of "slow burn storytelling."

Chapter three comes from Glenn McQuaid, director of the wonderful I Sell The Dead, and it was, to me anyway, the most intriguing chapter of the anthology, entitled "Tuesday the 17th."  A young woman brings her friends to a secluded wooded area for what they think is a weekend of partying.  Turns out this young lady has been here before, and is hell-bent on catching a weird killer (dubbed "The Glitch") who seemingly cannot be filmed.  Strange and off-putting, the idea of a killer that can somehow appear only as a series of glitchy shapes on film is very creative.  I wouldn't mind seeing more of this mythos.

"The Sick Thing That Happened To Emily When She Was Younger" is the chapter offered by Silver Bullets director Joe Swanberg (and co-writer Simon Barrett).  A young woman relates her frightening nighttime experiences by Skype (which somehow ended up on a VHS tape) to a friendly young man she knows.  There seems to be an attraction as she grows increasingly scared of ghostly people appearing in her apartment.  There's a puzzling twist to the story, yet it retains some intrigue.

Finally, we're privy to "10/31/98" from the directing team known as Radio Silence.  Four guys, excited to attend a Halloween party, arrive to find an empty house full of shadows and strange voices.  Exploring the house, they find a party of a different sort in the attic and insanity follows.  As far as environment goes, I really enjoyed this setting - even when there was stark, bright light, the house's interior was confining and uninviting.

V/H/S was incredibly interesting and had some very intriguing ideas.  Giving voice to independent directors and writers is really great - this movie did play in theaters and has a chance to reach a wider audience than most smaller horror films.  While I felt like more time could have been devoted to some stories, the thought-provoking aftertaste of "Tuesday the 17th" and "10/31/98" gives attention to the possibility that these stories could work as full-length films.  I got the sense that the filmmakers were having a good time with the experience, and even though I had hoped for a little more, I'm happy with the fact that we could see more from these talented artists.

Now...I dare you to go through your old VHS tapes.  See the one that's not labeled?  Yeah, go ahead and put that one in...you never know what you'll see.

Until you do, here's the trailer for V/H/S:

Exit 7A (2012) Short Film, Sweet Twist

The old adage says, "Less is more."  Learning my writing chops over the years, I was told that time and time again (and I'm still guilty of the occasional wordiness).  It's the same in film - there's a time and place for glitz and show, but unless you've got a basically good, solid story, it's just that:  glitz and show.

In watching Hammer and Saw Films' short film Exit 7A, writer-director William Peters told a lot of story in very little time.  Really, that's the point of a good short film:  to get its point across in a limited duration.  There's no need for "glitz and show," as the film does exactly what it needs to do:  tell a great story.  Peters and his crew accomplish that in a way that reminds me - despite my seemingly general comparison - of an episode of Twilight Zone or Outer Limits.  Like those programs, it's a straightforward mystery in which you know the answer, but it's not thrust in your face like an over-sharing kid showing off a half-melted ice cream cone.  It's subtle, telling a story rather than trying to impress you with insane visuals, and it opens up a possible universe of related stories.

Based on a short story by Asher Ellis, Peters presents the story of good-guy Paul (Ben Watts), on his way to a family gathering one winter day.  Harry (Michael Mooney) calls to tell Paul to get his butt in gear because he's off to work, and the relatives are "restless," especially Uncle Frank, who's not feeling too well.  Paul assures Harry he'll be there, but is distracted by a beautiful and mysterious hitchhiker (Angela Borrello).  Taking the winter air into consideration, as well as his own curiosity, Paul decides to give her a ride.  She's guarded, reserved, and haunting with her hypnotizing blue eyes.  She does, however, let Paul know his intentions:  she's planning on killing someone off of Exit 7A, and wonders just what Paul might do to stop her.

I'm not going to spoil it, but it plays out with intensity, and a nice little twist.  Peters does a great job in packaging a really good near-homage to the gore-less, character-driven subtle mysteries on which the horror genre is built.  While Mooney provides a solid supporting base and Watts is really good, capable, and believable lead, Borrello really stood out to me as she carried an air of confident mystery around her in playing off of Watts' Paul.  The film also looks great - the cinematography and framing show just how alone Paul is with the hitchhiker, despite the openness of the landscape.

According to Peters, Exit 7A will continue making the festival circuits before being officially released later this fall on the Hammer and Saw Films website.  I asked Peters if Exit 7A could end up being part of a horror anthology, to which he replied, "The thought of Exit 7A being a part of an anthology has definitely crossed my mind.  I think an indie horror anthology show would be awesome - something I would definitely support."

Hey, I like anthologies, so I'd be all for it as well!

Until next time, passengers, you can check out the official Exit 7A website here and take a look at the trailer below:


Exit 7A - Trailer from Hammer & Saw Films on Vimeo.